My Musing
What was Yaakov afraid of and what distressed
him?
Apparently, Yaakov was Eisav’s twin in more
ways that we imagine. The midrash sets up the appearance that Yaakov was strong
enough to handle Eisav. (This explains Rivka’s comment when she convinces
Yaakov to flee, to the effect that she will lose both of them)
Just because something is justified, does not
mean it doesn’t take its toll on the soul. As Golda Meir said to President
Sadat “We can forgive you for killing our
sons. But we will never forgive you for making us kill yours.”
מדרש תנחומא (ורשא)
פרשת וישלח סימן ד
(בראשית פרק לב:ז-ח) "וַיָּשֻׁבוּ, הַמַּלְאָכִים, אֶל-יַעֲקֹב,
לֵאמֹר: בָּאנוּ אֶל-אָחִיךָ, אֶל-עֵשָׂו,
וְגַם הֹלֵךְ לִקְרָאתְךָ, וְאַרְבַּע-מֵאוֹת אִישׁ עִמּוֹ. וַיִּירָא יַעֲקֹב מְאֹד,
וַיֵּצֶר לוֹ; וַיַּחַץ אֶת-הָעָם אֲשֶׁר-אִתּוֹ, וְאֶת-הַצֹּאן וְאֶת-הַבָּקָר וְהַגְּמַלִּים--לִשְׁנֵי
מַחֲנוֹת"
“And the messengers
returned to Jacob, saying: 'We came to thy brother Esau, and moreover he cometh
to meet thee, and four hundred men with him.’ Then Jacob was greatly afraid and
was distressed. And he divided the people that was with him, and the flocks,
and the herds, and the camels, into two camps.”
"וַיָּשֻׁבוּ, הַמַּלְאָכִים", מיד "וַיִּירָא
יַעֲקֹב מְאֹד, וַיֵּצֶר לוֹ" שני פעמים. ויירא שלא יהרוג, ויצר שלא יהרג. שהיה
יעקב גבור, תדע שלשר הגדול רפש שנאמר (הושע יב:ה) " וַיָּשַׂר אֶל-מַלְאָךְ וַיֻּכָל,
בָּכָה וַיִּתְחַנֶּן-לוֹ; בֵּית-אֵל, יִמְצָאֶנּוּ, וְשָׁם, יְדַבֵּר עִמָּנוּ"
באותה שעה התחיל מבקש רחמים שנאמר (בראשית לב :יב) " הַצִּילֵנִי נָא מִיַּד
אָחִי, מִיַּד עֵשָׂו: כִּי-יָרֵא אָנֹכִי,
אֹתוֹ--פֶּן-יָבוֹא וְהִכַּנִי, אֵם עַל-בָּנִים"
“And the messengers returned”, immediately, “Jacob
was greatly afraid and was distressed.” Two times. “greatly afraid,” that he
should not kill, “distressed” that he should not be killed, since Jacob was
strong. Know, that for the great official, slime, as it says, “So he strove
with an angel, and prevailed; he wept, and made supplication unto him; at
Beth-el he would find him, and there he would speak with us” At that moment, he
pleaded for mercy as it says, “Deliver me, I pray Thee, from the hand of my
brother, from the hand of Esau; for I fear him, lest he come and smite me, the
mother with the children.”
ראה גבורתו של יעקב מה כתיב בו (בראשית לא:מה) " וַיִּקַּח יַעֲקֹב,
אָבֶן; וַיְרִימֶהָ, מַצֵּבָה" וכמה שעורה?
אמר רבי יוחנן, שעורה כשינה של טבריה, התחיל לבן אומר ליעקב (בראשית לא : כט) "יֶשׁ-לְאֵל יָדִי, לַעֲשׂוֹת
עִמָּכֶם רָע; וֵאלֹקֵי אֲבִיכֶם אֶמֶשׁ אָמַר אֵלַי לֵאמֹר, הִשָּׁמֶר לְךָ מִדַּבֵּר
עִם-יַעֲקֹב--מִטּוֹב עַד-רָע"
Observe
the courage (strength) of Jacob. What is written regarding him, “And Jacob took a stone, and set it up for a
pillar.” And what was its measure? Said
Rabbi Yochanan, ‘Its measure was like the tooth of Tiberius.’ Laban began to
say to Jacob, “It is in the power of my hand to do you hurt; but the God of
your father spoke unto me yesternight, saying: Take heed to thyself that thou
speak not to Jacob either good or bad.”
"יֶשׁ-לְאֵל יָדִי", אמר לו יעקב, 'אילולי
שאמר לך השמר יש לאל ידך שתהרגני' בא אתה וכל אוכלוסיך. אם יש בהן כח יתגוששו עם אבן
הזו, וירימה, והוא הרימה מצבה כאדם שמעביר פקק צלוחית מן הצלוחית, ואף בני יעקב גבורים
כמותו היו שכן הוא אומר להם (בראשית לא:מו) "וַיֹּאמֶר יַעֲקֹב לְאֶחָיו לִקְטוּ
אֲבָנִים, וַיִּקְחוּ אֲבָנִים וַיַּעֲשׂוּ-גָל; וַיֹּאכְלוּ שָׁם, עַל-הַגָּל"
וכי אחיו היו? חד הוה ליה ולוי קבריה, אלא בניו היו והיו גבורין כמותו.
“It is in the power of my hand” Said
him to Jacob, “were it not that He said to you, Take heed, It is in the power
of your hand to kill me. Come along with all your camp. If there is enough
strength in them, let them struggle with this stone, and lift it. And he lifted
it as a man that removes the stopper from the bottle, and even the sons of
Jacob were strong like him, as he said to them, “And Jacob said unto his
brethren: 'Gather stones'; and they took stones, and made a heap. And they did
eat there by the heap.” And were they
his brothers? He only had one and he came to bury him, rather they were his
sones and they were as strong as he was.
כיון שפגע בעשו מה כתיב בו (בראשית לג:ד) " וַיָּרָץ עֵשָׂו לִקְרָאתוֹ
וַיְחַבְּקֵהוּ, וַיִּפֹּל עַל-צַוָּארָו וַיִּשָּׁקֵהוּ; וַיִּבְכּוּ"
בקש עשו לנשכו ונעשה צוארו של שיש לכך נקוד וישקהו
שלא היתה נשיקה של אמת. "וַיִּבְכּוּ" למה בכו? מה להדבר דומה? לזאב שבא
לחטוף את האיל. התחיל האיל לנגחו, נכנסו שיני הזאב בקרני האיל. זה בוכה, וזה בוכה.
הזאב בוכה שלא יכול לעשות לו כלום, והאיל בוכה שלא יחזור ויהרגנו. אף כך עשו ויעקב
עשו בוכה על שנעשה צואר יעקב כשיש ויעקב בוכה שמא יחזור עשו וינשכנו. על יעקב הכתוב
אומר (שיר השירים ז: ה ) " צַוָּארֵךְ, כְּמִגְדַּל
הַשֵּׁן; עֵינַיִךְ בְּרֵכוֹת בְּחֶשְׁבּוֹן, עַל-שַׁעַר בַּת-רַבִּים--אַפֵּךְ כְּמִגְדַּל
הַלְּבָנוֹן, צוֹפֶה פְּנֵי דַמָּשֶׂק"
ועל עשו נאמר (תהלים ג: ח) " קוּמָה יְקוָה, הוֹשִׁיעֵנִי
אֱלֹקַי-- כי-הִכִּיתָ אֶת-כָּל-אֹיְבַי לֶחִי;
שִׁנֵּי רְשָׁעִים שִׁבַּרְתָּ"
אמר הקדוש ברוך הוא לישראל בעולם הזה הפלתי שונאיכם,
ולעתיד ואתן אדם תחתיך (ישעיהו מג: ד) " מֵאֲשֶׁר יָקַרְתָּ
בְעֵינַי נִכְבַּדְתָּ, וַאֲנִי אֲהַבְתִּיךָ; וְאֶתֵּן אָדָם תַּחְתֶּיךָ, וּלְאֻמִּים
תַּחַת נַפְשֶׁךָ"
Once he
engaged Eisav, what is written? “And Esau ran to meet him, and embraced him, and fell on his
neck, and kissed him; and they wept” Eisav wanted to bite him and his neck was
turned to stone, therefore the word “and kissed him” is marked that it was not
a kiss of truth. “And they wept”, why did they cry? To what is this similar? TO
a wolf that attacks the ram. The ram begins to gore and and teeth of the wolf
sink into the horn of the ram. This cries, and this one cries. The wolf cries
that he is powerless to inflict harm on the ram, and the ram cries worrying
that the wolf will come back to kill him. Similarly, here, with Eisav and
Jacob. Eisav cries that Jacob’s neck became like stone, and Jacob cried that
Eisav might return to bite him. Regarding Jacob the the scripture said, “Thy
neck is as a tower of ivory; thine eyes as the pools in Heshbon, by the gate of
Bath-rabbim; thy nose is like the tower of Lebanon which looketh toward
Damascus.” And regarding
Eisav it says, “Arise, O LORD; save me, O my God; for
Thou hast smitten all mine enemies upon the cheek, Thou hast broken the teeth of the
wicked.”
Said the Holy One, blessed be He, to
Israel, ‘I felled your enemies, and in the future, I will give man under you. “Since
thou art precious in My sight, and honourable, and I have loved thee; therefore
will I give men for thee, and peoples for thy life.”