My Musing
Is it possible to be snide but respectful? Most people would say no, but it is interesting how the midrash uses the statement of Sarah, which at first blush is either neutral or somewhat cheeky, as an example of how she was a noble woman and supported him and let him achieve greatness. Could the author of the midrash not have found another example of where Sarah treated Abraham with respect?
Perhaps the midrash is trying to teach us the value of respect for others, even when you are being curt or snide.
מדרש תנחומא (ורשא) פרשת חיי שרה סימן בIs it possible to be snide but respectful? Most people would say no, but it is interesting how the midrash uses the statement of Sarah, which at first blush is either neutral or somewhat cheeky, as an example of how she was a noble woman and supported him and let him achieve greatness. Could the author of the midrash not have found another example of where Sarah treated Abraham with respect?
Perhaps the midrash is trying to teach us the value of respect for others, even when you are being curt or snide.
(בראשית פרק כד:א) "וְאַבְרָהָם זָקֵן בָּא בַּיָּמִים וַידֹוָד בֵּרַךְ אֶת אַבְרָהָם בַּכֹּל"
"And Abraham was old, come with days; and the Lord blessed Abraham in all."
אמר רבי יהושע בר נחמני, 'מפני ארבעה דברים הזקנה קופצת על אדם; מפני היראה, ומפני כעס בנים, ומפני אשה רעה, ומפני המלחמות.'
Rabbi Yehoshua the son of Rabbi Nachmeini said, four things cause old age to spring upon a person; from fear and awe, from the anger caused by children, from an evil wife, and from war.
Because of awesome fear, we learn from David, as it is written, "But David could not go before it (the sanctuary) to inquire of God; for he was terrified because of the sword of the angel of the Lord". What is written following? "Now David was old and satisfied of days; and he made Solomon his son king over Israel."
מפני כעס בנים, מעלי דכתיב (שמואל א,ב:כב) "וְעֵלִי זָקֵן מְאֹד וְשָׁמַע אֵת כָּל אֲשֶׁר יַעֲשׂוּן בָּנָיו לְכָל יִשְׂרָאֵל וְאֵת אֲשֶׁר יִשְׁכְּבוּן אֶת הַנָּשִׁים הַצֹּבְאוֹת פֶּתַח אֹהֶל מוֹעֵד"
From the anger at one’s children, we learn from Eili (the kohen at the time that Samuel is raised as a nazir and becomes a prophet) as it is written, "Now Eli was very old; and he heard all that his sons did unto all Israel, and how that they lay with the women that did service at the door of the tent of meeting."
מפני המלחמות, מיהושע שלאחר שעשה מלחמות עם שלשים ואחד מלכים מה כתיב בו (יהושע כג:א) "וַיְהִי מִיָּמִים רַבִּים אַחֲרֵי אֲשֶׁר הֵנִיחַ יְדֹוָד לְיִשְׂרָאֵל מִכָּל אֹיְבֵיהֶם מִסָּבִיב וִיהוֹשֻׁעַ זָקֵן בָּא בַּיָּמִים"
From war, we learn from Joshua, that after he did battle with 31 kings, what is written about him? “And it came to pass after many days, when the Lord had given rest unto Israel from all their enemies round about, and Joshua was old and well in years”
ומפני אשה רעה, דכתיב (מלכים א,יא:ד) "וַיְהִי לְעֵת זִקְנַת שְׁלֹמֹה נָשָׁיו הִטּוּ אֶת לְבָבוֹ אַחֲרֵי אֱלֹהִים אֲחֵרִים וְלֹא הָיָה לְבָבוֹ שָׁלֵם עִם יְדֹוָד אֱלֹקָיו כִּלְבַב דָּוִיד אָבִיו"
And from an evil wife, as it is written, "For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods; and his heart was not whole with the Lord his God, as the heart of David his father."
אבל אברהם אשתו מכבדתו וקוראתו אדני שנאמר (בראשית יח:יב) "וַתִּצְחַק שָׂרָה בְּקִרְבָּהּ לֵאמֹר אַחֲרֵי בְלֹתִי הָיְתָה לִּי עֶדְנָה וַאדֹנִי זָקֵן" ועליה נאמר (משלי יב:ד) "אֵשֶׁת חַיִל עֲטֶרֶת בַּעְלָהּ וּכְרָקָב בְּעַצְמוֹתָיו מְבִישָׁה" לפיכך כתיב ביה " וַידֹוָד בֵּרַךְ אֶת אַבְרָהָם בַּכֹּל".
But Abraham, his wife honored him and called him “my lord” as it says, “And Sarah laughed to herself, saying: 'After I am finished shall I conceive, my lord being old?” On her it says, “A noble wife is the crown of her husband, and like rottenness in his bones is one who acts shamefully.”
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